lj, me

maybe the day will come

maybe that day will come
when the sorrow fades
when the darkness retreats
when the tears rest
maybe the day will come
when laughter abounds
when memories draw smiles
when sunshine rejuvenates
maybe the day will come
when the hurt dulls to an ache
when the dreams bring comfort
when the heart feels mended
today was not that day

Husband hurt in fatal car accident taken off life-support – video news clip and article

sandraglen – the family's blog

I know time will lessen this hurt but when I look at pictures of Glen, I'm hit with the loss of him in this world. I dare not even think what his family must be feeling. If I feel like this, how must they feel?

And then I just cry again.

I know I should be comforted by the fact that he's not suffering, that he's the brightest angel up in the heavens watching over us. But I am not comforted at all. It's not fair at all that this genuine and gracious and loving man with such an easy smile and warmth should be snatched from this world. It's not fair at all but I know there's no use in screaming at the world about it.

So I just cry.

I remember how much I loved Glen, how happy I was that he was so good to my sister in the short time they were together. I remember how sad I was for him that it didn't work out between the two of them. And I was glad we remained friends and that he still cared enough to call me "Sis." It just made me love him more and I knew that he would always be my brother. Those quick and far between messages on Facebook always brought a smile to my face. Just a Happy Birthday was enough. I knew he was thinking of me and it made me feel good. Glen just knew how to be there.

When he found Sandra, got engaged, then married, I was very happy for him. I could see the love in his eyes for her and it warmed my heart. This gracious and loving man had found someone who loved him as he loved her, just as he deserved. And when his son was born, it was a delight to see the pictures of Glen with him. What a beautiful family he created with his wife. I looked forward to watching them grow together, even if just in passing.

My sister was the one who told me about the accident. She didn’t have many details so I went on the internet and found the news articles. It never sounded good but I could not believe that the universe would take Glen away. I believed that all the prayers and good wishes would bring him back somehow. I needed to believe it even though I knew deep down that he need a miracle to survive.

As the days passed and more details of his condition were revealed, I could not help but recall the recent weeks of watching my father-in-law in the hospital, how he had been on a ventilator and could not be on it for more than two weeks. I tried to push away the doubt and told myself to keep hoping until there was no hope. I told myself not to cry until it was time to cry.

And now it’s time to cry.

Monday the 21st would have been my father-in-law’s 67th birthday. I thought of him that day and thought how unfair it was that he was gone. We would not ever hear his silly jokes or hear him laugh. But he was not suffering anymore and I did take comfort in that.

Monday was the day of Glen’s CT scan and in the back of my mind I was waiting to hear even though I dread it too. The email– an update from the sandraglen blog— came that evening, its subject “Today is a very sad day.” I didn’t want to read it but I did.

“Dear family and friends,

We were called to the hospital to receive the news on Glen’s CT scan, and I’m sorry to say that our dear Glen will not make it.

The initial damage to Glen’s brain was catastrophic. His brain has not gotten enough oxygen to maintain normal brain functions. It has been dying from the moment of impact and is now all but completely dead…”

I started crying before I could finish it. What else was there to do?

Since that day, his Facebook profile is a constant tab on my browser. It comforts me to see all the people posting about Glen. We are all together in our sorrow but also together in our joy for having known him. Some of us find comfort in God, some of us find comfort with each other.

Now my poems are reflective of my sorrow, my words memories of Glen. This will pass, I know, and though I cry when I think of him, I smile too. He should not have been taken from this world but he leaves behind so much love that I can’t help but smile. What better legacy than the love and good will of his family and friends?

I thank the heavens above that Glen was my family, though just a short time in name. My life was brighter having known and loved him. After these tears, I know that I will remember him with laughter and love. I promise to remember him that way.

Glen, thank you for being my brother. I treasure every memory of you. I will keep you in my heart always.

together as a family