chris, poetry, TWITL

TWITL – week thirty – with just a gesture

how the memories
flutter in sweet reverie
with just a gesture

so wonderful & unexpected!
so wonderful & unexpected

The above vest jacket was delivered to me this week. I was expecting a package but had no idea of its contents until I opened the box and took it out. When I unrolled it, I seriously squealed then tried it on. I was overwhelmed by such excitement and utter delight, then humbled that something from the days of Young Hercules had found its way to me.

How do I say thank you to the person who sent it to me? Words seem a little inadequate but THANK YOU SO MUCH! I was just happy you thought of sending me anything but this just filled my heart. It reminds me of my convention going days and meeting you. It reminds me of those days hanging out with my friends and having fun talking about the shows and our favorites (of course, you were one of our favorites). The shows inspired me, entertained me, and I made lifelong friendships because of them. I was just a fan but now I have something from the other side, the side that created the shows. This vest jacket crossed an ocean and time to become mine so again, THANK YOU. I love it and will treasure it. I’m also going to wear it once the weather cools down.

the buttons say Xena Hercules
Xena Hercules on the buttons


Perpetual Grace LTD – Get to watching this show! It’s the reason I started a subscription to EPIX. And to be perfectly honest, I was set on watching it for Chris Conrad but OF COURSE the show is rather excellent. It is so well done all the way around. I’m behind a few episodes but what I’ve seen so far has me utterly hooked…

Pennyworth – Another EPIX show! And lo, a rather good one. I’m digging the show a lot and I’m dutifully intrigued. Since I don’t care about the canon of Batman, if there are things that aren’t quite right to the Batman stuff, I don’t really care because Alfred Pennyworth and his youth are more interesting to me than any adherence to any of that.

The Boys – We’ve watched a couple of episodes so far and I’m hooked! Of course I am, Karl Urban is in it and you know how I adore my favorites. It was funny, while we were watching the second episode, I commented on one of Karl’s IG posts and he ended up liking the post. It’s amazing how I can still feel a thrill over something like that. I think it keeps me young, eh?

Pearson – I must really still like Simon Kassianides to watch this show with ads. Well, the show is worth watching the ads, I’m glad to say. I hope he appreciates the love, ya know? (Okay, maybe he does. He actually RT’d me the night it aired and I lamented about having a bedtime.) I am enjoying this show. Gina Torres is a force and I love watching her command that screen. Oh yes, and Simon’s accent for show is starting to grow on me…

how cute are Frankie & his human Sully?
Frankie & his human Sully

Sully posted a little video of riding his bike with his doggie Frankie on his back. HOW FREAKIN’ CUTE ARE THEY?! So damn cute!!!

a screenshot of Jack
one of too many screenshots of Jack Whitehall

I posted the above pic to my IG on Friday and got a like from his mother. Oh dear. Well, I suppose that’s what happens when you hashtag a person, eh? People will find you.


I changed my IG bio a bit, taking out reference to Listworthy5 and adding Simon Kassianides and Jack Whitehall. At least I know the fellas I mention in my bio appreciate me (or don’t know me at all, which is fine to me). I don’t need to mention Listworthy5 in my personal bio.

After receiving that pretty cool vest jacket, I realized that my time is better spent on people who appreciate the fangirl love. I know I say that I don’t care for the attention back but I do appreciate even the slightest of notice, especially in light of a group effort. At the very least, it would be nice for our group to be noticed by the subject of our adoration. It really irritates me that he bestows attention upon the person who tried to steal our years of work and effort. The irritation is starting to turn to indifference and at this point, I wonder how long I can hold on. I’m tired of the negative energy and trying not to focus on it but part of me also likes the balance of it.

The vest jacket reminds me that I am lucky for the fantastic fangirl moments I’ve experienced in my life, whether back in the Xena/Herc/Young Herc days or the days now with social media and concerts. The happy moments make great stories. The sad disappointments by the hands fellow fans are the cautionary tales.